mijn engel.

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so i've gained about 20 pounds after having smoked my last last cigarette over a month ago. is this normal? i'm fatty. not as fat as "fat brian". but then again, who's really paying attention to my jiggling juts, anyway. it's strange--about a week after i began my nicotine hiatus, i began having vivid dreams, again. although, the return of oxygen to my tarred and ashen brain was a welcome event, i now have riveting and torturous dreams about smoking delicious cigarettes. and when i wake up, my throat throbs for a brief moment as if i've again tasted the sweet and carcinogenic. alas, barbequed chicken wings are no substitute for cigarettes. i fear that soon, so very soon, my nipples will fall parallel to my navel.

to smoke, or not to smoke....

i've decided to stick around in korea through august: my brother chris got me a job teaching at his friend kevin's college prep company. the $'ll fund my return to amsterdam in september. let's adventure!

where do dreams go to die?

trickle. trickle. (i miss my laptop)